Parshas Vayeitzei 5779

Extending our ‘I’

[Editor’s note: As a memory of my beloved brother Shaya, I would like to continue sending out his pearls of wisdom that he has shared with all of you in the past. For some of you this may ring a bell and for others it may appear to be totally new. May the learning of Shaya’s Divrei Torah inspire us to change our ways and thereby give an Aliya to the neshama of our dear beloved Shaya whom we miss so much.]

Rashi quotes from the Gemara that the twelve stones that composed Yaakov’s bed complained, as each one wanted to be the pillow for Yaakov’s head. Hashem morphed all of the stones into one big stone and that ended the complaining.

Why didn’t the twelve PARTS of the stone still complain, each wanting Yaakov’s head on its part?

The commentators answer that when you are one, there is no place for disputes or quarrels. Just as no one would get upset at his back when it needs some rest, or at his stomach when it needs some food, so too if you are truly ‘one’ with another person [or in this case, an object] then it is silly and senseless to fight.

However, I still have two questions that remain unanswered: Why didn’t Hashem make the pillow one stone in the first place? Secondly, the Seforim tell us that everything that occurs to Yaakov in this Parsha is a foreshadowing of Klal Yisroel in exile. What does this episode foretell and signify?

I think it is symbolic of Yaakov’s twelve sons; they started off as twelve Shevatim, each with their own personality, and it is their job to use their uniqueness as part of the larger mosaic called Klal Yisroel. Hashem wants each of us to have our uniqueness but to appreciate the uniqueness and special qualities of the other Shevatim of Klal Yisroel, and morph ourselves into one large being just as the rocks did!

We are all born self-centered, caring just about ourselves, yet we know that we are supposed to reach out and care for others. How do we achieve that? Rav Shimon Shkop explains the strategy is to extend your ‘I’ [i.e. who you consider ‘yourself’ to be]. A good person will extend his ‘I’ to include his whole family. A greater person will extend his ‘I’ to include all his relatives and friends. An even greater person will extend his ‘I’ to include all the people in his city, and a true Gadol will extend his ‘I’ to include all of Klal Yisroel [and all of humanity].

May we all try to keep extending our ‘I’ to more and more people, hence we will consider all of them to be part of ourselves, which will enable us to be at peace with all of them. We will then G-d willing merit the innumerable blessings that come when one is at peace with everyone.

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Parshas Vayeira 5779

Doing ALL Mitzvos with Joy

In this week’s Parsha, Avraham is given one of his greatest tests: Akeidas Yitzchak- to offer Yitzchak as a sacrifice to G-d.

Avraham epitomized the mida of Chesed [loving kindness]. He was involved in Chesed his entire life, so the commandment to ‘kill’ his son meant that he would have to go against everything he stood for and his entire personality.

Yitzchok embodied the mida of Gevurah [strict judgment]. His greatest test was also to go against his mida and personality. However, there is a difference of opinion between Rav Dessler & Rav Yaakov Kamenetzky as to what exactly Yitzchak’s test was.

Rav Dessler maintains that it was to give the blessings to Yaakov. Why was that so difficult for Yitzchak? Rav Dessler explains that Yitzchak knew that Yaakov was on a higher spiritual level than Eisav, so he felt that Yaakov should not get any material blessings. Rather, Yaakov should be solely reliant on strict judgment to receive them directly from Hashem. But when Yitzchak sensed from the voice that it was Yaakov, he realized that it was G-d’s will that he should forgo his lifetime emphasis on strict judgment and give Yaakov the blessings.

Rav Yaakov has a different opinion as to what the ultimate test for Yitzchak WILL be. He explains based on the Gemara in Shabbos [89b] that at the end of time, Hashem will come to Yitzchak and tell him “your children have sinned.” Instead of calling for them to be punished in accordance with his mida of strict judgment, Yitzchak will plead with Hashem to have pity on Klal Yisroel.

Either way, both Rav Dessler and Rav Yaakov agree that Yitzchak’s ultimate test is to go against the mida that he stood for.

So too with Yaakov. He epitomized Emes-truth, and was tested to go against his mida of Emes by having to trick his father into giving him the Brachos.

What is the reason for Hashem giving each of the Avos a test to go against the mida that they stood for?

I believe the explanation is as follows: There are many warm people out there who ‘out of the goodness of their heart’ are compassionate, warm, kind, etc. And there are many firm and exacting people like Yitzchak, and people who like to follow the truth like Yaakov. The way to tell if they are doing it sincerely only because it is G-d’s will, is if G-d asks them to go against their midos and personalities. If they oblige, that indicates that all of their acts of Chesed, Gevurah, and Emes were performed specifically because it’s what G-d wants them to do, and not just because they enjoy that mida. And then G-d will reward them for everything they did, as it was all truly done for G-d’s sake.

May we all try to follow in the footsteps of our holy forefathers by fulfilling the Mitzvos and aspects of Yiddishkeit that are less appealing to us with the same joy and devotion as the Mitzvos that we love and enjoy.

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Parshas Lech Lecha 5779

Why we do Mitzvos

One of Avraham’s ten great tests occurs at the beginning of this week’s Parsha: to leave his birthplace and travel to where G-d instructs him to go. G-d promises Avraham that if he listens, He will make Avraham into a great nation, bless Avraham with riches, and make his name great.
With all of these guaranteed rewards, wouldn’t it have been very easy for Avraham to listen and go? Why is this challenge considered to be one of Avraham’s ten greatest challenges?
Some of the commentators answer that Avraham’s test was to listen solely because it was G-d’s will, not because of all the benefits that would come from it. The test was the KAVANA [the INTENT].
Avraham passed the test with flying colors, as the Pasuk attests that Avraham left solely because it was G-d’s commandment.

This is a very applicable lesson for all of us. There are many aspects of Yiddishkeit where the act of the Mitzva is very pleasurable. What separates the ‘Adult from the child’ is the kavana. Are we eating because we enjoy food, or because we need to eat to stay healthy in order to serve Hashem properly? Are we learning solely because we love the intellectual stimulation and depth, or because Hashem wants us to study His Torah and get pleasure from it? Do we look forward to Shabbos as the day when we can simply relax from our hectic schedule, or as the day that we can connect to Hashem better without all of the distractions?

These are lofty goals, but as descendants of Avraham Avinu, we have that innate spiritual DNA to rise to the occasion of doing the Mitzvos solely because it is Hashem’s will, even though we derive pleasure from them.

[Editor’s Note: I think that this is a beautiful thought to keep in mind for this week’s Shabbos Project. Four summers ago, I had the privilege of going to Sydney, Australia on a SEED program. The program was a spectacular experience that I will never forget. At the end of the summer, I gave a good-bye speech.

One of the points I mentioned was that I gained so much from the teenagers asking questions, like “How do you know this law?” or “Why do you do this?” “What is the point of this Mitzva?” etc. My knee-jerk reaction was that we do it because Hashem said to… and then I thought to myself these teenagers were never exposed to the beauty and warmth of Yiddishkeit! How are they supposed to know what is the right thing to do!
Many people who grow up in a Frum environment just take for granted the sanctity of Shabbos: the holiness, the davening, the food, family time etc. We don’t realize what a treat we have with us every week. Sometimes it takes an outsider to allow us to appreciate what we have.
I think that this is one of Shaya’s points in this week’s dvar torah: we have to think about why we do Mitzvos and only that way will we be able to appreciate them properly.
Have a wonderful Shabbos!!]

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Parshas Bereishis 5779

Looking Back

On each of the six days of creation [with the exception of the second day, see the commentaries as to why,] the Torah says “and G-d saw that it was good.” However, at the end of the sixth day, the passuk says “And G-d saw all that he had made and behold it was VERY good.” What is the reason for this discrepancy of “VERY” good?

G-d did not create everything at once; rather, he made the world and it’s inhabitants gradually, and after each day, he was happy with what he created. But at the end of the week, G-d LOOKED BACK at the WHOLE week of creation, and G-d saw all that he made and it was very good.

Perhaps the Torah is teaching us an important psychological lesson.

When one embarks on a goal, like overcoming an addiction or working on a character trait, it takes time to make significant progress. Every day you work at it and make some progress, but it is slow. An important key to success is to take the opportunity after time has passed [a week, a month…], to look back at all that you have done, and then you will realize that you have truly accomplished a lot. That will give you the inspiration to keep pushing forward to the ultimate success.

[Editor’s Note: As I was reviewing Shaya’s Dvar Torah, it struck me that this is a perfect lesson for us. We have just finished the Yom Tov of Succos, which is followed by Simchas Torah. Simchas Torah is the completion of the reading of the Torah which was read Parsha by Parsha starting with this week’s Parsha. I once heard that one reason why Isru Chag is so special is because it is a day to reflect on what we gained from the past Yom Yov and what we will take with us for the coming year.

We have almost finished a month filled with uplifting Yomim Tovim. Let us take the time now to reflect on what we have gained from this past Yom Tov and try to renew our Kaballas that we took on in the beginning of the month; and with this, we will be zoche to greet Moshiach in our days!]

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Parshas Vayeilech 5779

Channeling Our Shortcomings

The Haftorah for this week’s Parsha, Parshas Vayeilech, opens with the words, ‘Shuva Yisroel ad Hashem Elokecha ki chashalta biavonecha’ – ‘Yisroel return to Hashem BECAUSE you stumbled with your sins.’

Rav Shach Zatzal elucidated the Pasuk in an interesting way. He said that the first time he was at Aish Hatorah, he was tremendously inspired and amazed at all of the Balei Teshuva in the yeshiva. Rav Shach said ‘from the stumbling in sin you can see what can be done in the positive, in Mitzvos.’ And then Rav Shach added to this idea giving the following example. ‘If one man [Hitler- may his name be obliterated] killed six million Jews, one man can save six million Jews.’

On a simplistic level, the lesson is to learn from all the wicked people’s planning, dedication, and actions and to use those same tools for Mitzvos. For example, if all the radical Muslims are so dedicated to their cause and are not embarrassed, meek, or shy to do what they think is right, then we shouldn’t be embarrassed to stand up for what is truly Emes, which is standing up for Torah and Mitzvos.

But on a deeper level as well, the Seforim tell us that almost all bad Midos-attributes should not be stifled; rather, we should channel them for the good. For example, the Gemara says that one who is born under the Mazal of Maadim will be a spiller of blood. Yet Rav Ashi tells us that it is up to that person to choose between being a murderer or channeling it for Hashem by being a Mohel.

Additionally, one who has the attribute of Gevurah can use it to look down upon and degrade others for their failings in Avodas Hashem. Or he can take that trait and channel it towards looking at his OWN deeds and being strict and exacting in his OWN Avodas Hashem.

As we approach Yom Kippur and reflect on our misdeeds of the past year, let us try to figure out what Midos are at the root of our various mistakes, and then take those Midos and devise ways that we can channel them in a healthy, proper, and positive way.

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Rosh Hashanah 5779

Reflecting on a Bee’s Sting

Editor’s note: As we go into Rosh Hashanah, here are two brief Divrei Torah I would like to share.

As is our custom on Rosh Hashana night, we dip the apple into honey as a merit to have a sweet new year.
The Avnei Nezer explains that the reason why we use honey is because honey comes from bees that sting us and cause us pain.
The obvious question is that if we are trying to signify something sweet, why should we choose something which is acquired with such pain? To get the honey out of the beehive a person has to cover himself up as much as possible and then take the honeycombs out of the hive. The bees are not happy and find a way to get under his protective clothing and sting him. It is a lot of work and causes him tremendous pain. Why should this be the symbol of a sweet new year?

Rabbi Yisroel Reisman explains that something which is easily sweet is just not sweet, it is not the sweetness that human beings experience. Sweetness is something which comes with hard work. Something which comes with a few bee stings attached to it. Life and success in life comes with sacrifice. That is why we use honey from bees to symbolize that just as honey is acquired through suffering and hard work but ends up being sweet, so too, the pain and suffering that we endured this past year will be the sweetness of our future.

A second thought: I heard a beautiful thought from Rabbi Yosef Berger (a Rav in Baltimore). Rabbi Berger said that when Rosh Hashana is approaching, people will often reflect on all the bad things that happened in the past year to themselves or to people they know. They think about all the people who died or experienced sickness etc. But they neglect to think about all the good that Hashem has bestowed on them as well. The countless births, marriages of young and older singles, simchos, parnasah, etc. He said that we have to keep in mind all the good things that happen to us and that if we would think about how much good Hashem does for us on a daily basis, we would feel indebted to Hashem and act differently.

May we all use these precious upcoming days to get closer to Hashem and daven for all the things we need and to recognize that Hashem is our King and can do anything and through that merit the ultimate Geulah with the coming of Moshiach speedily in our days!
Ksivah Vchasimah Tovah!

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Parshas Ki Savo 5778

Appreciation

This week’s Parsha begins with the Mitzva of Bikurim [bringing the first fruits to the Beis Hamikdash], followed shortly thereafter by the terrible curses that occur if we don’t fulfill Hashem’s Mitzvos. The close proximity of the curses to Mitzvas Bikurim in the Torah begs us to ask what is the connection between them.

The Medrash gives an analogy: There was a king who saved a girl who was being beaten by robbers. He rescued her, brought her to his palace, and married her. He wanted to have a loving relationship with her, but she refused to talk to him or even thank him for all that he did for her. So the king put her back into the dangerous environment amongst the robbers and then she started crying and pleading to be saved. That was exactly what the king was waiting to hear.

Similarly, Hashem saves us from our enemies and gives us land, peace, security, and comforts. And then we forget about Him and think that our peace and security is due to our own wisdom and strengths. So in order to wake us up, He brings about painful afflictions, like pogroms, crusades, holocausts, and ‘natural’ disasters like hurricanes, earthquakes, tornadoes and droughts.

Now we can understand the importance of the Mitzva of Bikurim. After entering Eretz Yisrael, we won our wars, settled our land with comfort and security, and are now harvesting our first crop of delicious and profitable fruit. The bringing of these first fruits to the Beis Hamikdash is our way of recognizing and admitting that all of our accomplishments are a gift from Hashem. It is our way of reminding ourselves not to fall prey to thoughts of ‘kochee viotzem yadee…,’ that it is our strength that grants us our success. Hence, when we don’t bring the Bikurim, we are are falling prey to the philosophy that ‘it is our strength that has enabled our success, and that we don’t need Hashem.’ Thus, what comes next are the terrible curses of the tochacha, that rip us away from our homeland and from our tranquility, to wake us up to remember that it’s NOT our military strength and wisdom that enables our success.

What about nowadays, when we don’t have the Beis Hamikdash and cannot bring Bikurim? How can we rectify this sin? How can we repent and show Hashem that we have realized the fallacy of these Hashkafos?

The answer is Tefilah. We daven three times each day in place of the Mitzva of Bikurim, to recognize and acknowledge that all that we have is from Hashem. Yes we do our hishtadlus, but ultimately, it is our recognition that it’s all from Hashem that grants us our stability and tranquility. That is the purpose of Tefilla three times every day. Sometimes it inconveniences us in our busy work schedules, but perhaps the point is to wake us up and remind us that all our work is just a mere Hishtadlus. Although there are wicked people who are wealthy and there are righteous people who suffer, ultimately, it is this fundamental Hashkafa that will grant us serenity and true happiness.

The Avos, who established the three tefilos (shacharis, minchah, and ma’ariv) did not do so while in obvious danger or terrible times. On the contrary, they established davening during the relatively peaceful moments of their lives. This demonstrates to us that is this type of davening that is most important. When we are in trouble it’s very easy and obvious to daven, as ‘there are no atheists in a foxhole.’ The real challenge is when things are going just fine. Do we pride ourselves on our own talents, or do we have gratitude to Hashem and give credit where credit is due? As Rav Yerucham Levovitz says, ‘people think we have to daven when there is a crisis, and if there are no crises then we are okay. In truth, it’s just the opposite we have crises BECAUSE we aren’t davening properly.’

Let us all try to daven properly and sincerely, thanking Hashem when things are going well; before the next health issue comes up, before the next storm hits, before the next bomb blows up, before the next crisis occurs. In that way, we will do our share in rectifying the sin of not bringing the Bikurim [and of not keeping the Shmitah and Yovel years, which involve this same fallacy]. Instead of all the curses listed in this week’s Parsha, we will G-d willing merit all the wonderful blessings that come when we fulfill His wishes.

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Parshas Re’eh 5778

Listening Equals Blessing

This week’s Parsha begins by telling us that Hashem places before us the opportunity to receive a blessing or curse depending upon whether we keep the Mitzvos. However, upon closer reading, the verses seem peculiar. Although the Torah says in regard to the curses ‘and the curses, IF you don’t listen….,’ by the blessing it says ‘the blessing that you listen…’ It doesn’t say you’ll get blessings IF you listen. This seems to imply that the listening to the Mitzvos is itself a blessing. What does that mean?

The Mishna in Avos, after contrasting the great Midos of Avraham and the poor Midos of Billam, tells us that if we follow in the ways of Avraham, ‘we will enjoy the fruit of our good deeds in this world and inherit the world to come.’ What does this mean?

Some people think that if you live an immoral life and do what you want with no rules and boundaries, then although you will lose out in the world to come, you will at least enjoy this world. The truth is that such a person will not enjoy this world either. He will live a meaningless life, and he will fall prey to his bad Midos. His jealousy and lusts will control him, never allowing him to be satisfied with what he has. Whereas a person with good Midos who strives to do the will of Hashem, although he or she may be tested and go through some difficult stages of life, in the long run he or she will enjoy even this world much more than someone with bad Midos. Hence, the Mishna says that one with good Midos enjoys both worlds, whereas the one with bad Midos has nothing in either world.

Leaving Yiddishkeit is like a leaf falling off a tree. It flutters around for a little bit, but soon afterwards it is shriveled and withered on the ground with no nourishment and vitality. As the Pasuk states, the Torah is a TREE of life for those who HOLD onto it!

I suggest that is what our Pasuk is alluding to as well. It is telling us that besides the reward that we will get IF we listen to Him, the listening to Him is itself a blessing! Authentic Avodas Hashem keeps us happy, healthy, and balanced spiritually and emotionally.

Although we strive to serve Hashem altruistically, let us also keep these thoughts in mind to give us chizuk when times are tough and when we feel overwhelmed and pressured to give in to the Yetzer Hara; that by keeping the Torah and it’s commandments we will live a much happier and healthier life emotionally and spiritually.

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Parshas Va’eschanan 5778

Contemplate Before Pouncing

This week’s Haftorah begins with Yeshaya Hanavi’s famous words, ‘Nachamu nachamu ami yomar elokaychem,’ ‘Comfort comfort my nation, so says your G-d.’

The Medrash cryptically comments that when Yeshaya said the words ‘Nachamu nachamu Ami’, Klal Yisroel wanted to kill him; i.e. they were very upset with him, until he continued and said, ‘yomar elokaychem [so says your G-d].’

Why was Klal Yisroel so upset with Yeshaya, and how did he defuse their anger with the words, ‘yomar elokaychem???’

We have a tradition that when Klal Yisroel observes the Torah and Mitzvos, Hashem calls us ‘Ami’ [MY nation]. When Klal Yisroel does not act in accordance of Hashem’s commandments, the Navi refers to us as ‘Amaych’ [YOUR nation]. So when Klal Yisroel heard Yeshaya say ‘Nachamu nachamu AMI’, they thought Yeshaya was saying that he was calling them ‘Ami.’ The implication was that they were NOT considered Hashem’s nation, meaning Hashem was NOT happy with them, and had not forgiven them for their sins. This caused Klal Yisroel to be incensed with Yeshaya’s words of ‘Nachamu Nachamu Ami,’ which didn’t seem to be a Nechama. Therefore, Yeshaya continued ‘yomar ELOKAYCHEM’, that this was a Nevuah [prophesy] from HASHEM. HASHEM was calling Klal Yisroel, ‘Ami,’ as Hashem HAD forgiven them for their sins, and therefore, indeed, there was a Nechama!

[The above I saw from Rav Madshan Uruch]

Perhaps one lesson we can extract from this Medrash is to always allow a person to finish his or her statement before pouncing on their words! If we must ever confront someone publicly, we should know what his/her complete opinion is before speaking out. Often a quote we read or hear about a person may have been taken out of context.

Let us take this lesson to watch what we say and through that merit the ultimate Nechama with Moshiach and the rebuilding of the Beis Hamikdash in our days.

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Parshas Devarim 5778

A Selfless Leader

In this week’s Parsha, Moshe blesses the Jewish People that they will increase a thousand fold.
The Sifri, quoted by Rashi, brings the following dialogue between Moshe and Klal Yisroel:
Klal Yisroel ask Moshe, “Why are you limiting the number of our offspring? Hashem gave us a bracha that we will be as numerous as the dust of the earth!” Moshe responds, “this [bracha] is from me, and Hashem will bless you like He already promised.” (To understand why Moshe gave them a seemingly pointless bracha, as Hashem had already blessed them that they would be innumerable, take a look in Rabbi Frand’s first sefer on Chumash for a beautiful answer from the Chasam Sofer.)

Why did Moshe bless them to increase specifically a THOUSAND fold? The Hafla provides us with a clever calculation to answer this question. There were two times in the Midbar when Hashem became ‘frustrated’ with Klal Yisroel to such an extent that He told Moshe that He will destroy Klal Yisroel and remake a great nation from just him (Moshe). Hashem didn’t tell Moshe how great He would make him.

Chazal tell us that the good Hashem does for us is always 500 times greater than Hashem’s punishment. Hence, each time Hashem told Moshe, ‘I will make from you a great nation,’ it was to be at least 500 times as numerous as Klal Yisroel. Twice 500 times is a thousand. Even though Hashem didn’t carry out his plan of destroying Klal Yisroel, we have a rule that anything Hashem says for the good, even with a condition that is not fulfilled, He never retracts.
So Moshe had a bracha ‘in the bank’ that his descendants would be multiplied a thousand times as much as Klal Yisroel. This Bracha he now [in our Parsha] gave to Klal Yisroel that THEY should multiply a thousand fold! With this we can fully appreciate the words Moshe said, ‘This is from me.’ Not just that Moshe was giving them a personal Bracha. Moshe was telling them ‘this was my very own Bracha that I got from Hashem and now I am giving it to you Klal Yisroel!”

How fortunate were we to have such a selfless leader!

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