Musings of Shaya
Dearest Shaya,
I am not sure what you know up there right next to the Kisei Hakavod- right next to Hashem, so let me share with you a couple of things that have happened since you were niftar.
Your beautiful legacy that you have left us is still going strong. So many people have gained so much and are constantly inspired to change their ways because of all the beautiful inspiring divrei torah that you wrote every week.
Not everyone knows, however, of all the hours that you put in every single week to tweak the dvar torah to perfection, to ensure that no one would get insulted by your words. How you spent hours ensuring that the grammar was correct, and hours upon hours looking through different sefarim and listening to countless shiurim to find that perfect balanced Dvar Torah that no one on ‘either side of the fence’ (right/left wing) would be hurt by. Your Divrei Torah hit home no matter if the person reading it had a kippah seruga/ black hat/ streimel/ covered their hair or didn’t. Everyone was truly inspired.
Your legacy continues, as one of your chavrusas whom you learnt with for a number of years before you were niftar has finally finished his first tractate in Gemarah (Berachos) and has started another one. Someone to whom a thought of finishing an entire tractate may never have come to his head if not for you drilling in to him that drive and passion for Torah. That person was able to make a siyum on Tractate Berachos and start another one and it is all thanks to you for starting that drive and to the person that helped him accomplish this goal after you left us.
Your holy legacy continues as other chavrusas of yours who were indelibly inspired by your patience, warmth and smile continue to strive for greater and greater heights knowing that you, Shaya, are looking down from that high place in Shamayim and are flashing them that huge smile of yours and telling them “YOU CAN DO IT! JUST A LITTLE BIT MORE…!”
Shaya, your legacy continues as people all around the world do things for you for the Iluy of your sweet Neshama.
Shaya, so many people were touched by that warm smile of yours no matter how difficult the illness may have been at that time – that smile had to be on your lips!
That smile, I thought that I was the only one to get that one thousand watt smile whenever you saw me, and then I realized during your shivah that you gave that smile to every single person to whom you encountered and it was a genuine and authentic smile because you truly loved each and every person you met as if they were a close friend or relative. It made no difference who the person was, you always managed to find the good in that person and to praise that person.
What a privilege to have someone like you in our generation and family!
Shaya, there is another side of you that I as your little brother was privileged to see. It doesn’t mean that other people couldn’t have seen this side, it just means that it is another side which I recall quite fondly about you.
It is the big brother side of you.
I still recall vividly all of the stories that you would share from your Rebbi when you were in middle school. I must have been 5 or 6 years old. You had a fantastic ability with your amazing memory to recall every detail of the story and you made it so alive with your story telling! Ahh! Those were the days!
Shaya, it was you who the Shabbos before that big day when I would start high school came over to me and said “Hey Baruch Leib, would you like to learn together?” And then, you spent the rest of the afternoon teaching me that first Mishna so that I would be prepared when I would begin Yeshivah the next week.
Shaya, do you recall all the fun we used to have on Shabbbos afternoon, playing Tap Tap and all those fun games? You made it so much fun to play with! Who else was it but you who taught me how to play checkers which to this day I enjoy playing as a result of all your patience in teaching me! Oh, how you tried to teach me how to play chess, but to no avail.
Shaya, do you recall all the many hours you spent with me in the Schabes’s backyard teaching me how to play basketball and perfecting that swish to a Tee and how you always tried to raise the hoops higher and higher to challenge me further and further?
It wasn’t just me and it wasn’t only when it came to games that you pushed people to grow. It was in everything in life. You were and continue to be a role model in life for so many people. And you did it in such a sweet way. You didn’t say to people, “Look at me, look at what a challenging life I have! I am still able to smile and cheer people up, why can’t you?” You just went and acted as your friendly self and put on that huge thousand watt smile that we all love and miss, and subtly the people that were close to you were in awe in all that you accomplished in your short but very fruitful years, with all the pain and suffering you endured during your long sickness.
Shaya, as you sit next to the Kisei Hakovod and bask in Hashem’s presence; daven for all the suffering in this world to end. Daven for all those singles who are looking to get married, for all those people who don’t have children yet to merit to have children, for all those who are in need of a livelihood, health, and any other pain and suffering to merit their salvation.
I know that in the world that you are in now, there is no pain and suffering because everything makes sense up there, but we who reside in this world, in a world of falsehood where what appears to be good is really not and vice versa, we don’t understand all this pain and suffering. We are davening that the ultimate Geula will occur. Please tell Hashem that enough is enough and that it is time to bring the final redemption with the coming of Moshiach very soon!
Love,
Your youngest brother who misses you tons,
Baruch Leib
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