CALL US 443-660-9132

A Timely Torah Message By Shaya Gross

Balancing Our Midos
[Editor’s note: As a memory of my beloved brother Shaya, I would like to continue sending out his pearls of wisdom that he has shared with all of you in the past. For some of you this may ring a bell and for others it may appear to be totally new. May the learning of Shaya’s Divrei Torah inspire us to change our ways and thereby give an Aliya to the neshama of our dear beloved Shaya whom we miss so much. A special thank you to Aaron Friedman for always looking over the divrei torah.]

This week’s Parsha begins by informing us that Pinchas received the covenant of peace rewarding his act of zealotry. At first glance, this seems ironic, a covenant of PEACE for being a ZEALOT???
But if we think about it a little deeper, with the understanding that Shalom means more than just peace but rather harmony and perfection, then it makes ‘perfect’ sense.
We are not a people who act solely with Chesed, as unbridled Chesed leads to immorality… Nor are we a people who act solely with Gevurah-strict judgment, as too much Gevurah in Chinuch pushes kids away… Rather, we are a people who seek to fuse our Midos into perfection; using Chesed in its proper time, Gevurah in its proper time, and likewise with all other Midos.

The proper definition of shalom is having a perfect balance in all midos and using each mida in its proper time.

This is the hallmark of our Gedolim, a few that I have merited to meet and see for myself, and many more of whom I have read about. They may have some very strong opinions about certain topics and certain practices, but when you come to speak with them, their warmth, love, and care is so evident.

This, I suggest, is the understanding of the covenant of Shalom concerning Pinchas. Pinchas, as the Torah emphasizes, was a grandson of Aharon, the quintessential lover of mankind. Pinchas had in his blood the warmth and love of Aharon. Yet when it came to matters that he had to take a strong stance on and act zealously, he did so. Hence he merited the covenant of SHALOM for his act!

May we all take this lesson to heart, to always work hard towards having a synthesis in our Midos, using each one positively in its appropriate time.

{Editor’s note: This week, we began the three weeks, ending with Tisha B’av, the day we mourn the destruction of our Beis Hamikdash. The Gemara says that if a person lives in a generation that the Beis Hamikdash has not been rebuilt, he must consider it as if his generation destroyed the Beis Hamikdash.

Rabbi Aharon Feldman pointed out that the Gemarah is teaching us that we have to look at the destruction of our Holy Temple as if each and every one of us destroyed the Beis Hamikdash. The only person to blame is ourselves. Rabbi Feldman pointed out that if we would examine ourselves carefully, we would see that we exert so much effort in our daily and personal life to shift the blame from ourselves on to other people. “I was late to work because of this reason,” or, “I couldn’t finish the project because of this…” that is the beginning of our personal destruction. When we wipe away all of the excuses and “step-up to the plate,” we will be transformed into stronger and better people who can take to the plate and face any of the pitches that Hashem throws our way. Instead of bunting to first base, we can hit a home run right out of the park.

May we all take this lesson to heart as we enter into the three weeks; that it is our own faults and shortcomings that cause us to be the way we are and once we come to that realization, we will be able to work on ourselves and rebuild our own Beis Hamidash and ultimately bring Moshiach with the Beis Hamikdash in our days.}

To be added to the weekly Dvar Torah list please email

Recent Posts